Customs, Culture, Etiquette & Manners in India

Customs, Culture, Etiquette & Manners in India

Culture 

Culture is the characteristics and knowledge of a particular group of people, encompassing language, religion, cuisine, social habits, music and arts.

Customs 

Customs is a traditional practice or usual way of doing something followed by a social group of people

Manners

Manner is a person's outward bearing or way of behaving towards others

Etiquette

Etiquette is the customary code of polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group. Etiquette change depending on the culture and the standing of the individual in the society. For example, a middle class person will have a different set of etiquette, compared to a upper class person. However, both of them can have the same set of manners. 

Principles underpinning all Etiquette

• Golden - Treat others as you would like to be treated
• Platinum - Treat others as they would like to be treated

Types of etiquette

• Business
• Meeting
• Telephone
• Social
• Travel
• Eating

Business Etiquette 

Business etiquette is about building relationships with other people.Etiquette is not about rules & regulations but is about providing basic social comfort and creating an environment where others feel comfortable and secure, this is possible through better communication.

Why Business Etiquette?

• Differentiates you from others in a competitive job market
• Enables you to be confident in a variety of settings with a variety of people
• Honors commitment to excellence and quality
• Modifies distracting behaviors and develops admired conduct
• Exhibit Professionalism and develop a polished image

Difference between Social and Business Etiquette

Social Etiquette

• Marked by Courtesy
• Gender Plays a Role

Business Etiquette

• Marked by Hierarchy & Power
• Gender has no Role

Certain important business Etiquette are :

• E-mail Etiquette
• Business card Etiquette
• Cubicle Etiquette
• Office Etiquette
• Meeting Etiquette
• Networking
• Dress Etiquette
• Telephone Etiquette
• Travel Etiquette
• Dining Etiquette

E-mail Etiquette

In today’s rapidly changing workplace, overlooking the value of the written word is easy to do. Writing skills are as important in electronic form as in paper communication. It is important to take an extra moment to review and organize your thoughts before keying them onto the screen and pressing the “send” button. Here are some email tips and a review of email diplomacy:

• Include a clear, direct subject line
• Use a professional email address
• Think twice before hitting `reply all’.
• Include a signature block
• Use professional salutations
• Use exclamation points sparingly
• Be cautious with humor
•  Know that people from different cultures speak and write differently
• Reply to your emails – even if the email wasn’t intended for you
• Proofread every message
• Add the email address last
• Double check that you’ve selected the correct recipient
• Keep your fonts classic
• Keep tabs on your tone
• Nothing is confidential  - so write accordingly

Business Card Etiquette

Be ready for that exchange. Keep your business cards on hand and in pristine condition.

The business card – an often underestimated workhorse of networking – can be a powerful tool in forging new and memorable relationships. However, many people have never stopped to think about the rules regarding the small but mighty card. Remember these tips before you hand over your contact information in the business world.

• Make an Impact – A great card is sturdy, informative and makes it easy for the recipient to interact with and remember you.
• Expect the unexpected – Nothing makes a statement more than handing someone the wrinkled and smudged card, one that conveys lack of preparation.
• Be respectful – If possible, begin an interview or professional exchange by politely handing your card to the others in the meeting.

Cubicle Etiquette

Cubicle etiquette is another important facet of workplace etiquette.  As the workplace continues to get more and more competitive, the smallest thing can prevent you from future opportunities. 

• If something is private, keep it that way - If you are having a private conversation do not talk about it in your cubicle. 

• Be considerate of other people's sniffers  - Be careful of the smells you bring to the office

• Decorate with taste - You need to use good judgment when decorating your cubicle. 

• Be aware of your voice - Talking loudly all the time is one easy way to annoy others.

• Respect other's privacy -  It is not good cubicle manners to chime in on other's conversations or to peek over at them.

• Use the Golden Rule - Act in your cubicle the way you would have others act. It shows good professional etiquette when you treat your space and the space of others around you with respect.

Office Etiquette

• Those who follow good office etiquette are promoted and given choice assignment
• Those who are seen as crass or unkempt are passed over or have their employment terminated
• Be self-aware-use common sense
• Mind your own business
• Never go over your supervisor’s head
• Obey your company’s business dress code
• Treat every employee with the same respect
• Do not post things of an offensive nature
• Show a healthy respect for colleagues experience and expertise
• Exhibit a positive attitude and know what your role will be on the team – How can I best assist?
• Leave your personal live at the front door
• Inquire about the proper way to respond to co-workers, supervisors, clients (Business letter head, phone call etc.)
• Greetings
• Punctuality
• Space
• Time
• Play the Host
• Posture
• Hovering
• Communication
• Credit & Compliments
• Speak well of your co-workers

Meeting Etiquette

Codes of Conduct while attending Meetings

• Avoid swear words and vulgar references
• Poor communicating skill is not professional
• Avoid personal questions  during first meeting
• It is important for an individual to behave appropriately in public to earn respect and appreciation. One must learn to maintain the decorum of the work place.
• Whoever gets to the door first should open it and hold for others who are following
• Turn off your cell phone ringer, accept voicemail and text messaging only

Networking

• Don’t travel with your friends
• Make direct eye contact, smile and speak
• Contribute positively to the conversation with your thoughts and open ended questions
• Don’t monopolize someone’s time
• If appropriate, collect business cards
• Politely excuse yourself and move on to another individual
• Social Etiquette - the customary code of polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group.

Grooming - Dress Etiquette 

Grooming means dressing well, to be presentable to others. You may want to give a little more attention to how you dress at work because what you wear may be substantially influencing your career path. You never have a second chance to make a first impression.

• The Professional looks
• Dress for the part
• Simple but Classy
• Grooming – Grooming is fundamental

General Grooming

• Neatly trimmed hair
• Light perfume or cologne
• Clean & trimmed finger nails, clean skin and teeth
• Limited Jewelry 
• Polished shoes
• Stockings without runs
• Wear only formal belts with a sleek buckle. Match your belt to your shoes.
• Concealed tattoos; no visible body jewelry
• Preferably wear leather strapped watches, if you wear a metal strapped watch, make sure that it fits the wrist well.

Tips

Presentation does count. It is important to appear fit, healthy, clean, happy, energetic, confident and well dressed.

A casual office environment doesn't mean that you have to dress carelessly.

Dress as you want to be seen; a person who takes their job seriously, is professional and upward - bound.

Business Casual Wardrobe

Benefits of Dressing Professionally

• The Transformation effect 
• Dressing professionally improves self discipline
• Appreciation and respect
• The power of visuals
• Influence and authority
• Positive assumptions
• Makes you confident and most important
• It's easier to get to the top if you look like you belong there
• First Impression

• For Men – Dark/Slacks/khaki pants, White, Off White, Blue polo shirt or other collared dress shirt, well maintained dress and casual shoes
• For Women – Women may wear Sarees, Salwar Kameez, Formal Shirt/Trousers or tunic with a pair of formal trousers and casual shoe

Grooming - Men

Shirts

Colors - White, Off White, Blue Shirts are preferred, though you may wear dark colored too. Do not wear thick stripes and checks.
Trousers
Trousers should preferably be dark though you may wear beige with a dark colored shirt.

Shoes

Wear a good pair of leather shoes - black and brown/tan shoes. 

Shoes must be polished everyday

Do not wear shoe without laissez as they are considered semi-formal.

And also do not wear shoes with worn out heels.

Socks

Choose a colour that co-ordinates with your trousers usually black, dark grey, dark brown or dark blue.

Make sure they are long enough to cover your skin when you sit down.
Tie
Your tie should co-ordinate with your attire, choose a traditional silk tie, no loud colors or patterns the knot should be a perfect triangle.

Grooming - Women

Make-up for professional women should always be applied in moderation.
A woman who doesn't take time to put on the minimal amount looks tired before her work has begun.

Women may wear Sarees, Salwar Kameez, Formal Shirt/Trousers or tunic with a pair of formal trousers.

• Preferably choose small prints or self colors.
• Avoid plunging necklines, sleeveless and tight fitting clothes

Rings - Keep them simple and sober but not chunky.
Chains - You may wear thin chains with small lockets
Bracelets/Bangles - You may wear either a bracelet or a bangle. Avoid wearing both together.
Earring - Wear small Rings
Bags - Apart from you working bag if you are carrying an additional bag, preferably carry a Black Brown one.
Shoes or Sandals - Shoes with 1.5 inch heels are standard. You may wear a pair with smaller heels or a flat pair.
Stick with a Black or Brown pair.
Make sure that your shoes are polished and heels are intact.

Telephone Etiquette

Telephone Etiquette means being respectful to the person you are talking with, showing consideration for the other person's limitations, allowing that person time to speak, communicating clearly and much, much more. Your voice must create a pleasant visual impression over the telephone.

• Identify yourself when making a call
• Address the caller by his name in a courteous manner
• Keep conversation brief
• Never be impatient
• Listen carefully
• Do not interrupt
• Do not eat or chew something while speaking on phone
• If you wish to put the caller on hold, request his permission to do so
• Close your conversation with an appropriate salutation
• Let the caller hang up first
• In case of missed calls, return the call within a reasonable period of time
• If someone calls you by mistake, inform the caller politely that he reached a wrong number

Travel Etiquette 

Travel Etiquette raises countless questions. How messy should you leave a hotel room? How much should you trp a cab driver? Who owns the airplane armrest? What are appropriate expectations for kids on a plane? Do you say hello to strangers on the streets of a bustling metropolis? Though there are some basic rules of civility that are globally recognized - listening to what other people say, being aware of what other people do, and interacting with other people with respect - many of the answers to these questions depend on cultural context.When travelers encounter a very different culture, expectations - on both sides of the culture divide - change. Here are six simple, often ignored rules for making all your future in-transit travel-be it by plane, train, bus or automobile - more agreeable.

• Mind personal space
• Clear the air
• Travel is not the time to engage in any sort of personal grooming
• Keep it simple
• Rise above
• Be the change you want to see in the world

Dining Etiquette

No society can survive or flourish unless its members accept rules governing food sharing and consumption. Mealtime manners, which govern the way food is eaten in the company of others, provide for giving and receiving small, vital, and constantly reiterated signs that these rules are in working order. Furthermore, the specific fashion in which a culture manages eating helps to express, identify, and dramatize that society's ideals and aesthetic style.

Civilized and considerate people the world over demand that meals shall be eaten with respect, not only for the food and the effort and good fortune it represents but also for the people in whose company it is eaten. Human beings normally eat in the company of others. The word "company" is derived from Latin, meaning "bread with," and therefore "those who share food." The act of sharing a meal becomes a symbol of every kind of relationship and of the acceptance of cultural values that may seem to have little to do with consuming nutrients. Since eating normally happens more than once a day, human beings turn meals into opportunities to learn and to practice "culture." Politeness at meals provides daily exercise in making socially desirable norms "second nature."

• Be on time
• Wait to sit until host/hostess indicated the seating arrangement
• Stand on the right side of your chair and enter from your left
• Put your napkin in your lap
• Decide on your menu selections quickly
• Never order the most expensive item
• Wait for all people to be served before beginning
• Know which silverware to use with which food
• Wait until everyone has been served before you begin to eat
• Salt/Pepper pass together
• Generally pass food to the right

Athithi Devo Bhava – meaning `Guests are forms of God’

The mantras are from the Taittiriya Upanishad, Shikshavalli 1.11.2 that says : Matrudevo bhava, Pitrudevo bhava, Acharyadevo bhava, Athithidevo bhava. It literally means “be one for whom the Mother is God, be one for whom the Father is God, be one for whom the Teacher is God, be one for whom the Guest is God.

One of the most defining characteristics of Indian culture is hospitality. Hospitality becomes an act of worship. People in India have the highest regard for guests and value hospitality.

Some tips you should keep in mind to make your visit a pleasant one for your and for your host when visiting a home.

• Dress conservatively, especially if you are a woman. Revealing clothes and exposing skin are frowned upon and will make everyone in the house uncomfortable.
• It is not necessary to take a gift when visiting a home, though it is always appreciated.
• In most homes, footwear is taken off outside the main door and the house is entered barefoot.
• Do not attempt to hug or kiss anyone on the cheek unless it Is initiated by the other person.
• Always ask for permission before taking photographs of the family, especially of women.
• Wash your hands before and after a meal.
• Ask for whatever you want instead of reaching out directly or pointing at dishes.
• Don’t make too much noise, don’t talk with food in your mouth.
• Wait until everyone else is sitting down before starting to eat.
• Help clear the dishes, unless it is not acceptable in that particular custom.
• Don’t talk on your cell phone during the meal and if you, must get up in between, ask to be excused.

Indian etiquette is an unusual mixture of British and Asian influences. Therefore in some ways our customs will seem familiar to westerners and in other ways in which Indian etiquette differs from western etiquette are as follows:

This section will be particularly helpful if you are relocating to India and intend to work.

Dining etiquette can be very different in India. It is consider proper to eat with your hands, and in a lot of restaurants or when you are eating with locals, cutlery may not be provided, though in most places spoons can be provided if asked for. If you do try to eat using your fingers, make sure you only use your right hand and not your left, even if you are left handed, as the left hand is considered to be ‘unclean’. Also as common sense would suggest, your fingers will be messy from eating with them, and as such do not try to serve yourself so as to avoid dirtying the serving spoon, but wait to be served by a waiter or your host. Sharing of food is good in Indian manners. However, never share cutlery or drink from someone else’s glass or take food from someone’s personal plate, as this is considered very offensive. Coming into contact with another’s spit is called `Jootha’. All the food that is placed on your thali becomes jootha. There is no precise English equivalent of ‘jootha’, contaminated comes closest in meaning.

Instead of saying `Thank you’ at the end of a meal, but praising the food and showing your appreciation as you eat will be well received.

It is common to remove your shoes as a sign or respect before entering a temple and indeed before entering into someone’s home.

Due to the influence of hierarchical Indian social structure, the oldest or most senior person present should be greeted first, followed by the next most senior and so on.

As a result of British colonial influence, handshakes are the standard greeting in a business environment.

Indian culture places a great deal of importance on personal relationships, and many business relationships will be built upon a personal foundation. Therefore being introduced by a mutual acquaintance will stand you in good stead.

Normal business dress for both men and women is western in derivation.

When talking to Indian people, make sure to be aware of your body language, as much significance will be attached to it. Avoid `aggressive’ postures such as folded arms or hands on hips.

Title are important in India, and as such people should be addressed formally, i.e. title (Mr. Dr. etc.) and surname. Only use someone’s given name if they have expressly given you permission to do so. For a stranger who is not so old, it is better to suffix the name with `ji’, as a mark of respect.

When managing Indian employees – The Indian approach to business roles is generally formal and hierarchical. Therefore a boss is expected to be a boss, and to act as such. Junior staff will expect to be given clear and comprehensive instructions rather than coming up with their own ways of working.

Avoid touchy, taboo subjects such as India’s poverty, or the caste system as Indians are rightly very proud of their country’s long and rich history and culture.

India is a place where unnecessary formality can create feeling of insult. It is fine to thank someone who has provided a service to you, such as a shop keeper or waiter, lavishing thanks on friends or family should be avoided. Doing things for those whom they are close to as implicit the relationship. If you thank them, they may see it as a violation of intimacy and the creation of distance that should not exist. Rather than saying thanks, it is best to show your appreciation in other ways, “like I really enjoyed the food and spending time with you”.

In Hindi, there are three levels of formality – Intimate, familiar and polite.

Don’t outright decline an invitation or request, that can be considered disrespectful. Instead of saying `no’ or `I casnt’ directly, give evasive answers such as `I will try’, or `maybe’ or it might be possible or I’ll see what I can do’.

Don’t expect people to respect your personal space. Overcrowding and scarcity of resources leads to a lot of pushing and shoving in India.

Don’t expect people to be punctual. IST means Indian Standard Time. Sometimes it denotes Indian Stretchable Time in India. The concept of time is flexible. 10 minutes can mean half an hour, half an hour can mean an hour.

Don’t show affection in public. It is okay to `piss’ in public but not kiss in public in India.

Don’t overlook your body language- Traditionally, women don’t touch men in India when meeting and greeting them. Giving a `Namaste’ with both palms together is often a better alternative.

Don’t judge the whole country - India is a very diverse country and a land of extreme contrasts. Each state is unique and has its own culture and cultural norms.  With your limited experience, you should be careful not to draw blanket conclusions about the whole country.

First observation in first impression

• Social heritage
• Educational Level
• Trust Worthiness
• Level of Sophistication
• Economic Heritage

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#Mantrams

ഓം സിദ്ധി ബുദ്ധി  സഹിതായ ശ്രീമഹാഗണാധിപതയെ നമഃ
ഓം ലക്ഷ്മി നാരായണാഭിയാം നമഃ
ഓം ഉമാമഹേശ്വരാഭ്യാം നമഃ
ഓം വാണി  ഹിരണ്യഗർഭാഭ്യം നമഃ
ഓം സചിപുരണ്ടരാഭ്യം നമഃ
ഓം  മാതാപിതൃ ചരണ കമലേഭ്യാം നമഃ 
ഓം കുലദേവതാഭ്യം നമഃ
ഓം ഇഷ്ടദേവതാഭ്യാം നമഃ
ഓം ഗ്രാമദേവതാഭ്യാം നമഃ
ഓം സ്ഥാനദേവതാഭ്യാം നമഃ
ഓം വാസ്തുദേവതാഭ്യാം നമഃ
ഓം സർവ്‌ഭ്യോ ദേവതഭ്യോ നമഃ
ഓം സർവ്വഭ്യാ സ്ഥിർത്ഥഭിയോ നമഃ
ഓം ഏതത്കർമ്മ പ്രധാൻ ശ്രീഗായത്രിദേവ്യാ നമഃ
ഓം പുണ്യം പുണ്യാഹം ദീർഘമായുരുസ്‌തു

Aum sidhi budhi sahitaya  sreemahaganadhipataye nama:
Aum Lakshmi narayanabhiyam nama:
Aum uma maheshwarabhyam nama:
Aum vani hiranyagarbhabhyam nama:
Aum sachipurandrabhyam nama:
Aum matapita charanakalabhabhyam nama:
Aum kuladevatabhyam nama:
Aum ishtadevatabhyo nama:
Aum gramadevatabhyo nama:
Aum sthanadevatabhyo nama:
Aum vastu devatabhyo nama:
Aum sarvobhyo devatabhyo nama:
Aum sarvabhyasthirthabhyo nama:
Aum etatkarmma prathan sreegayatridevyo nama:
Aum Punyam punyaham deerkhamayurstu nama: